Relationship, Couples

The blog includes articles I have written over the last few years, as well as a weekly post where I share what’s on my mind, even if it’s an undeveloped idea that popped up when I was stirring a vat of cheese!

Contradictions: Heroism, Sexual Abuse, Reconciliation

When I started college in 1973, it was a time of great political and social ferment in the US, and in a lot of other places too. I barely had time for

Body of Knowledge: War, Emotion, Attachment

Since time immemorial I have had a complex relationship with my body. By age 11, I was in the grip of what I later came to learn was anorexia, a baffling interplay

Friendship Matters: Dreams, Friendship-Wreck, Janina

As far back as I can remember, I longed for a best friend. I guess a best friend represented the equivalent of a beloved partner or even parent who placed me first

Amending Our Process: Crafting Apologies that Heal

When I was perhaps as young as four years old, my mother taught us a little apology ritual. I don’t know how she devised it or where it came from. Whenever we

Neglect Informed Sex Therapy: Evil? “Solutions”, Health

In the early years of the Millennium, it seemed as if the world was suddenly haunted by a dreaded and insidious enemy. It kind of reminded me of the opening lines of

Sex Matters: Regulation, Sex-Ed, Voice

As we head into mid-life, it is natural and typical to think about the passing of time, what is behind us and what lies ahead; what we have and have not achieved

Sick and Tired – Neglected Illness, Parental Illness, The End of the Day

Last week I had a (for me) truly strange experience. While sitting quietly and alone in my psychotherapy office, out of nowhere, I had a wild dizzy spell. I say “wild” because

Milestones: Self Reflection, Miracles, and Best Wishes of the Season

For me historically, holidays, anniversaries, birthdays and other marked dates that cycled around every year laden with hopes and expectations, fantasies and even magical prayers were always a terrible trap. Particularly those

A Sense of Self

People, Place, and Brain In our apartment building in New York, everyone seemed to have numbers on their arms, sad eyes and thick German accents. My great Aunt Gertrud would take me

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