As all who have been in the world of trauma, whether as clinician, researcher, survivor, or some combination thereof know, the area of greatest injury to life and to function is the domain of relationship. That has certainly been the crippling pain, anxiety, shame, or simple cluelessness most likely to bring people to my therapy …
Berkeley author Michael Chabon’s touching memoir, Manhood for Amateurs, begins with his declaration that his story started with the birth of his brother when he was five years old, saying: “Before that, I had no one to tell it to.” With no “other,” existence itself is questionable, which is why neglect is so very lethal. …
Way back at the beginning of our relationship, I remember my husband saying to me, only very slightly in jest, that there are really only three important activities to do on vacation: “eat, sleep and make love.” At the time, now over thirty years and many vacations ago, that was actually a terrifying prospect. Not …
Like most of us in the U.S., this latest spate of mass shootings and particularly school shootings, has flooded me with every imaginable emotion: grief, rage, despair, fear, impotence and more. When I finally become able to think, my mind is like a jammed Los Angeles freeway cloverleaf at rush hour, with countless vehicles crammed …
Learning from Experience – Ricotta, Red Flags, Right to Life? Read More »
As I was pondering what to write about this week and thinking that of late, my blogs have been perhaps too “dark”, I happened to catch a whiff of the pungent dirty gym socks-like odor coming off ME! The unmistakable smell of Breve Bacterium Linens, or what those of us in the know affectionately refer …
A ten-year love relationship spanned roughly the decade of my 20s. Out of ten years, I spent about four of them trying to leave this man, a dizzying switch back and forth between moving out and moving back in. I thought he was the love of my life. I finally succeeded in wrenching myself out …
Inconsolable: Heartbreak, A Puppy, Attachment Trauma Revisited Read More »
Sometimes a story or a movie is truly worth well over a thousand words to express and convey an often wordless experience concisely. This week I decided to do something a little different and dip into popular culture – commenting on a film and a book, both of which speak to our themes, portraying them …
High Culture: Twin Towers, Long Steep Climbs, Regulation Read More »
As an inveterate bookworm and student, I am reading all the time, and there is never enough of it—Oy vey. But what a wonderful problem to have when compared with the years of slogging to get through the day. However, with all that I read, it is not that often that I learn something that …
Updating My Files: “New” Paradigms, Damage Control, It’s All About Regulation Read More »
As we mark the second anniversary of the seemingly endless global pandemic, let’s not allow it to eclipse International Women’s Day on March 8th, which doggedly rolls around year after year in the similarly seemingly endless march towards equality, justice and simple dignity. Some decades ago, when cigarette advertising was still legal in the US, …
Half the Sky: Miscarriage, Abortion and Reflections on Motherhood Read More »
When the pandemic began, there was a crazy run on toilet paper. Oy vey! An African client told me about exclaiming to his mother, “I don’t get it about this toilet paper thing. Americans don’t know how to clean their butts!” He explained to me that in his country their custom is to wash themselves …
Who Gives a S _ _ _? Incontinence, Constipation and Regulation Read More »
